Are You Committed or Just Interested?

You think you are committed and then an offer comes along and you actually consider it. Newsflash, you are not committed! You are just interested.

You wouldn’t expect people to say that:

Beethoven was interested in music

Shakespeare was interested in writing plays

David Beckham is interested in football.

Commitment means to live, breathe and eat the subject.

Commitment implies exclusion. Not getting involved with anything else that takes us away from what we are already committed to – think marriage. You commit to love, cherish and stay with that person, for better or worse, whether richer or poorer, in sickness and health, forsaking all others until you are parted by death. That's the promise made, and around one in two who make it are still able to keep it.

In the news this week was a story about an online content creator who recommended keeping your personal life off of social media. The reason? It was the way that she found out her fiancé cheated on her whilst on his stag event. She may have been committed, but he obviously wasn't.

In our house, my youngest got offered music lessons from a teacher that I applied to a few weeks back when we had to change from their old teacher. In the meantime we had found a great new teacher who is during the week and term-time only, saving me money and meaning we both get a lie-in at the weekend. Yet, I was going to have youngest try out this offer and then finally decide which teacher he wanted to keep.

I have been told about a position that will be available soon that someone thinks would suit me. The hours are flexible, the role local, the people are nice to work with, I am qualified and would enjoy the work and it comes with a salary and benefits. But I have started a business. I work for myself now. Why am I giving the thought of this position houseroom?

That's the thing, until you say no thank you and burn your bridges to what is being offered being an option, you are not committed, just interested. It is like running forwards in a direction and then going back to the start every time another offer is presented to you. Going backwards will not keep you on the path to where you had set off to reach in the first place.

Had the fiancé said no to the woman he began the affair with, he would be married now and the relationship with his fiancé would have grown. My youngest is very happy with his new teacher and doesn't want to change, so I declined the offer of lessons with teacher number three, eventually! I will look at the job offer when it comes through, because I have said that I will, but I know that commitment to the growth of my business will require me to say no thank you, close the door and burn the bridges.

Is there a situation in your life that you are playing at being committed to, but are really only interested in?

If you are still not sure, think about the example my husband kindly reminded me of. The pig that produces bacon is committed. The hen which produces an egg is only interested.

Which one are you? Time to become committed. The rewards are far greater. (Although maybe not for the pig).